Broccoli for Breakfast - YUM!

That's right, I like my fiber in cruciforous plant form, not in a pill dissolved in water. I heart Trader Joe's Organic Broccoli Florets. Already cut up like an OFW likes 'em! Sadly, this does not mean I am a vegetarian. No true OFW really is, in her heart. I am a carnivore through and through. I loves me some little animals and big animals and fishes and birds, but I love to eat them more, I guess. I tried going vegetarian when I was in my 20's (doesn't everyone?), but my hair started falling out, my skin lost its luster way earlier than it should, I started wearing Birkenstocks with socks and bathing a patchouli oil and smoking clove cigarettes and...my dad (mostly Native American and partly French-Canadian - hence the rockin' French surname. It is rockin' - you'll just have to take my word on that) said, "Honey, we can't NOT eat meat-we're Indins!". (He was born and raised on a reservation, so he gets to say 'Indin'. You, paleface blog reader, do not. Sorry, I don't make the rules, I just enforce them.) Alas he was right. And yes, vegans, I ate plenty of legumes and shit, no lack of protein. It just wasn't animal-based and even my guru who is an Indian from India said my people need animal-based protein, so there. At least that's what I heard. It could be a crock of shit but I'm still hangin' my hat on it. And yes, of course OFW's have gurus! You can't BE a guru and not HAVE your own guru. That's like recovering alcoholics in AA sponsoring people and NOT having a sponsor themselves. It's done, but it's WRONG. But that's another topic altogether.

So what, you may ask, do I need a guru for? Thanks for asking. I need one for my mental/creative/spiritual health. I practice Transcendental Meditation and I couldn't have learned it in a vacuum. Well, technically, I could have learned it in a vacuum* (if you want to get all quantum physics technical-which I don't) if I could navigate my way there and back succesfully and sit around and figure shit out for myself. I cannot. I am not Guru Dev** and I don't have time to sit around in caves in India for years on end figuring this all out, and the Universe finally figured THAT out ('bout time, Universe!) so it created this guy who DID have the time and the desire to sit around in caves coming up with a technique that even a simple human like moi can use to find profound rest, bliss, even transcendance. And if the OFW can do it, anyone can.

OK well, gotta go. I'm telling ya, nothing works like raw broccoili!

*not a Hoover, like a Zero Point Field kind of vacuum.
**Shankaracharya Swami Brahmananda Saraswati, who passed it on to Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, who passed it to my teacher, who passed it on to me. Jai Guru Dev.